Thursday, May 24, 2007

Mad Libs on the Toilet

In response to the previous post...

I do sleepwalk. It's rather terrifying not being able to control yourself in your sleep. Utterly terrifying. On one particular occassion I went into the guest room at my parents house when I still lived there and went through my visiting brother's suitcases. I took everything out of them and refolded everything and put them back in. So apparently I'm OCD while asleep. Awesome.

Another time I turned on every single light in my apt. and opened every drawer. Obviously I was looking for something. When I woke up I also found some old mad libs on the toilet seat. That's what I was looking for. Mad Libs.

Do you think that sleep walkers are living, if just for a moment, in a parrallel universe where Mad Libs are something really important? I like to think so.

Following Your Dreams is a Pain in the Neck!

My neck hurts.
Usually when you're sore, it's the result of some strenuous activity the previous day. But, do you ever wake up and have soreness in muscles when you did nothing the previous day? The only thing that can account for this soreness is that I must have done something strenuous in my sleep last night. Maybe it's something as simple and boring as sleeping in the shape of a cocktail shrimp with my head snugly packed into my stack of pillows against the wall. But I would like to think I was following my dreams (literally) by sleep walking. I mean, I frequently get the feeling, when I wake up, that a lot has just happened and I have absolutely no recollection of it. I distinctly had that feeling this morning, and now, what? A sore neck! So I conclude SOMETHING happened! Maybe I was out fighting Ninjas who came to steal the swords from the ledge in our house. Or maybe I was defending our property from the Red Horde (the Commies for you post-Regan kids). Who knows where my nighttime travels took me last night? Walking down Main Street with my eyes closed may have gotten me into a fight with a bar-fly outside of Quincy's or Mesa Theater. Maybe I wrestled a homeless guy after stepping on him in the alley. Maybe I went to a 24 Hr. Gym and did neck exercises. The possibilities are endless. In conclusion: Following Your Dreams is a Pain in the Neck!