Burger King and the Pursuit of Happyness

I'm just sayin' - if I was 3 months overdue on rent and I had a kid and a wife to support and nobody would buy my damn bone density scanner...I would go get a job at Burger King. They are always hiring. And who knows, you might actually like it and decide to make it your career. Then on your lunch break you could go try to sell the bone density scanners and maybe a little cheeseburger would help the sell. Plus you could have it your way. When you order your hamburger, ask for a bun between two quarter pounders. Now, am I looking down on the guy who's got the gumpture to try to be a stockbroker? No way. But you know what, if I were interning at a place like that and the boss asked me to go get him a coffee-I'd get it and then I'd bring him a skateboard and a piece of bologna. That would confuse the hell out of him.

Country Jam USA

I went to Country Jam last night. Man there's nothin' like drinkin' beer in a 'wife-beater' in 100 degree weather lookin' at scantily clad chicks or dudes to fight. Oh plus Toby Keith was there. We're looking at booking JWU next year!!

A Poem to My Sly Guy

Kuzwup's float, they do not fly
They eat grass and absorb clouds until they die
Very rarely do they cry
In treetops is where they lie
You might see them in flocks in the sky
Their skin is the color of blueberry pie
Its hard to tell a girl from a guy
For a pet, a Kuzwup you might buy
Make them happy you must try

???

Unhyuhuhhhhh

He said "Hey Josh," I looked over to see his sad, weary face, "Unhyuhuhhhhh"

Swallowing Pencils

This is Rupert, the "Drawing Dog". He is one of only a few dogs in Colorado that can draw well. Rupert is seen here lecturing on the pencil and it's origins. "The pencil is named after 'penicillin' because it was originally swallowed as a pill to kill infections," he said in a speech to Mesa State students. His claims were not referenced and no connection between pencil and penicillin can be made by reading Wikipedia. Rupert likes to listen to JWU and Tommy Heavenly6. The end.

toothpaste for lunch

Charity says: "JWU! brush your teeth and go to bed!"

Corporate Coffee

I think this is a painting of a Starbuck's...it might be a photo...yeah I think it's a photo. Mmm Starbuck's. Corporate Coffee. I think Corporate coffee is better anyway, don't you? What's with these local coffee shops popping up everywhere? One day they're going to put our beloved hometown Starbuck's out of business. Let's join together and boycott these small no name locally owned coffee shops. Take a stand for what's right. Well, hell, here are their names: Traders, Coffee Muggers, Java Junction, Cup of Heaven, ect. these people are mindlessly serving good coffee not realizing how this is harming Starbuck's. Imagine a world without Starbucks. It like the Barefoot Man sings "Does anyone speak English in Miami?" it sort of the same thing...kind of...well...it's a bit differnet.............actually it has nothing to do with that song, but do you see what I'm sayin'? So today, save some quarters you were going to put in a tip jar or drop into a charity and go support your local Starbuck's.